Alien skin

You knew someone felt it too when the screeching head sprung out of that guy in Alien. But there was no warning until the siren. No heading advice on the ups and downs of an extraterrestrial breakout or how to treat broken skin, ribs.
How arrogant, or lazy, they don't tell you about the mornings after. Reenactments made out of dreams and air. The humming fan. Concentrate on the siren. No small shots, deep breath. No caffeine. They didn't warn you and even if they did you can't piece together the ripped organs, intestines.
Someone could have written a book. A self-help best-seller. Clues for stain removal. Stitches upkeep. No coffee before the tail is through. How to rehabilitate the empty space, panic in the bedroom window.

(Written by Monica Hooper, 10:48 a.m. Saturday, May 22, 2010)

Looking east, south

Chris and I are quickly approaching the end of the semester, but he's more than ready to skip a couple of planes over the ocean to an exotic new place where we don't speak the language.
Though I'm open to this situation, I'm terribly worried about our cats. We have two cats, one is very sickly, the other is quite mean — he's still a kitten and likes to play, hates affection that's not completely on his terms. How many people ship cats overseas and when we get there how do we get them back to the U.S.?
There's also a problem in getting over ... where?
I've researched teaching in Japan, and for the first time in my adult life, my master's actually makes a considerable difference in my placement. That would be remarkable news, but Chris doesn't have a masters or teaching experience, so pooh-pooh on that.
The other issues are based in the bickering between Chris and me over the move itself. He wants to move by the end of summer. My stance is that we can net better teaching opportunities if we finish this certification process than if we sign up with a company and move over without a certificate. Once again, I'm worried about what happens to the cats, where we will live, etc. Then once we get there, how do you get to a doctor if you need one, what happens if we get into a big fight and break-up?
Chris said it is an impulsive decision (this was well into hour 2 of the argument) which worries me because I have two impulsive moves under my belt, Memphis in 2001 and Conway in 2006, both saw me right back to Jonestown. Admittedly the latter move was for the best, and it also serves as a reason to move. I hated working in the news in Conway and it's no better in where I'm working these days. I'm starting to believe that Arkansans would be happier with their heads buried deep in the sand. They won't come out for air or water, just flashy graphics and barbecue.
I'm not going to deny that teaching again is appealing, especially since I'll never get another post at a school in this state. Since I don't have the money for a car, moving to a place where neither of us will need one sounds really good. And I do want to live in a foreign country.
Perhaps I'm just being paranoid. Maybe it's just Seasonal Affective Disorder (kicks in during long rainy seasons).
In the meantime, I want to start a photo blog based on disposable camera shots. That way I can't set my expensive camera on some fancy, schmancy setting in order to recover a great shot. Besides, my gritty, day-to-day reality would be better served on film at this point.
More later...

For Inez

Snow still lines the streets of this one horse town, but the warm sun promises spring. Yesterday's mourning procession fades in my memory as the "The Truth the Dead Knows" echoes in my memory.
"Why am I still here?" I ask myself. Park the car. Walk to the grey cube holding my daily intake of potential and note-taking.
Deep breath. Just a little more time till and you can cross "Living overseas" of the list. Then "writing a novel." Then "finding true inner peace."

So far, so so

Though I'm not a dedicated dieter, I've stuck to working out with my Your Shape for Wii.
I haven't noticed a drop in weight and my pants are as tight as ever, but the workouts themselves are getting a little more bearable. Still, I've cussed Jenny McCarthy's avatar so many times now.
The camera detects your movements, but not as close as they make you think. So you'll be doing heel jacks —which are like jumping jacks except with less movement — then stumble and you'll hear a ding and she'll say "Great job! You're really doing well!" or "That's the ticket," the nice canned aerobic instructor talk. On the other hand, you'll be performing a move to the best of your ability and she chides: "Opps! Let's watch those arms!" or  "See if you can follow my lead."
Thankfully the voice option can be nixed along with the horrific musical choices. I keep the voice on because the program has hundreds of exercises, which she explains the first few times they cycle through.
Hopefully my pants will be looser next month, until then....
Oh, I got a column picked up by www.wm3.org. I wrote a column criticizing the judge over seeing the West Memphis Three appeal. The defense team was into it. Go to the Web site to read it if you want. Otherwise, have a good one!

Aiming for after

Many people, including my boyfriend, argue that setting New Year's resolutions is setting yourself up to fail. Despite this warning, I'm setting some anyway.
My main resolution is to be healthier. I've vowed to lose weight year after year, but I've only pulled it off once or twice. I'm not that concerned with my body's shape anymore because I'm not getting any taller and I kind of like being curvy.
My new aim is to start taking better care of myself. These past holidays, I've binged on food, booze and whatever. This year, I'm practicing severe restraint. Those "guess what you did last night" conversations are starting to weigh more heavily on my mind, plus I'm cutting my caloric intake so there go the martinis...
Aside from that, I want to keep improving my writing and photography. Be less negative. Love more people, places, books. See more sights.
And, finally, grab Chris, and move out of Jonesboro!!!

Firebugging — these are some photos I took a while back

Now that you've unlocked the door

Now that you've unlocked the door,
Take a moment to appreciate the pose.
Those before,
whether the lock was picked,
or the key found,
didn't soak in,
the turn of the hinges,
the slant of the wood,
when one portal was open
to more doors to open.