For Inez

Snow still lines the streets of this one horse town, but the warm sun promises spring. Yesterday's mourning procession fades in my memory as the "The Truth the Dead Knows" echoes in my memory.
"Why am I still here?" I ask myself. Park the car. Walk to the grey cube holding my daily intake of potential and note-taking.
Deep breath. Just a little more time till and you can cross "Living overseas" of the list. Then "writing a novel." Then "finding true inner peace."

So far, so so

Though I'm not a dedicated dieter, I've stuck to working out with my Your Shape for Wii.
I haven't noticed a drop in weight and my pants are as tight as ever, but the workouts themselves are getting a little more bearable. Still, I've cussed Jenny McCarthy's avatar so many times now.
The camera detects your movements, but not as close as they make you think. So you'll be doing heel jacks —which are like jumping jacks except with less movement — then stumble and you'll hear a ding and she'll say "Great job! You're really doing well!" or "That's the ticket," the nice canned aerobic instructor talk. On the other hand, you'll be performing a move to the best of your ability and she chides: "Opps! Let's watch those arms!" or  "See if you can follow my lead."
Thankfully the voice option can be nixed along with the horrific musical choices. I keep the voice on because the program has hundreds of exercises, which she explains the first few times they cycle through.
Hopefully my pants will be looser next month, until then....
Oh, I got a column picked up by www.wm3.org. I wrote a column criticizing the judge over seeing the West Memphis Three appeal. The defense team was into it. Go to the Web site to read it if you want. Otherwise, have a good one!

Aiming for after

Many people, including my boyfriend, argue that setting New Year's resolutions is setting yourself up to fail. Despite this warning, I'm setting some anyway.
My main resolution is to be healthier. I've vowed to lose weight year after year, but I've only pulled it off once or twice. I'm not that concerned with my body's shape anymore because I'm not getting any taller and I kind of like being curvy.
My new aim is to start taking better care of myself. These past holidays, I've binged on food, booze and whatever. This year, I'm practicing severe restraint. Those "guess what you did last night" conversations are starting to weigh more heavily on my mind, plus I'm cutting my caloric intake so there go the martinis...
Aside from that, I want to keep improving my writing and photography. Be less negative. Love more people, places, books. See more sights.
And, finally, grab Chris, and move out of Jonesboro!!!

Firebugging — these are some photos I took a while back

Now that you've unlocked the door

Now that you've unlocked the door,
Take a moment to appreciate the pose.
Those before,
whether the lock was picked,
or the key found,
didn't soak in,
the turn of the hinges,
the slant of the wood,
when one portal was open
to more doors to open.

All the hunger aside...

What do you do with an extra birthday cake?
My boyfriend's dad gave it to me, and I don't want to be rude and not eat it but I made a cake last night, my mom baked a cake for me last week. So we have three chocolate cakes in the house.
As I try to diet during the week of Thanksgiving. Hmm...
My daily dieting tip suggests swapping regular soda for diet soda. Everytime I try this "trick" I wind up hungry. There's something about the sweeteners used sugar-free drinks that makes me ravenous. So I think I'll try to switch to water.
As for the treadmill, I hate that bitch. She's locked up in the gym anyway. Maybe I'll go for a walk on the real road instead of running in place like a hamster.
It'll be fine as long as I don't turn the iPod up too loud. Last time I went for a jog with my headphones on, a truck almost squished me.

An American Paradox

This week my news assignment is to write a preview of Homelessness and Hunger Week in my little ol' neck of Northeast Arkansas. Meanwhile, I've embarked upon a new diet and exercise routine, which will consist of my running in place on a treadmill, struggling through exercise DVDs and trying not to pump every quarter I can find into the Coke machine at work.
As for my feature about people who unwillingly find themselves under fed and over-worked, it has to be compelling. Though I seriously doubt anyone will donate canned goods and lunch money to food banks for more than a day after the article, I don't want to tap out some Sally Struthers' rag about the poor starving children and all the things our fat ass mayor is doing to help them out.
Despite my own body weight issues, I'm very lucky to be overfed considering how many hungry, homeless and destitute people live in Northeast Arkansas.
If I wasn't growing my gut so large that it no longer fits into my pants, I'd probably drop the diet and exercise regime. Denounce it as a decadent act by a privileged, spoiled brat who eats too much.
However, I'm about to be 29 years old, so we'll see how this develops.